Living with a mentally ill husband, I learned, “Don’t argue with Crazy.” Reality is in the eye of the beholder. When someone you love is faced with a reality that you don’t see, it’s ok to let them have that reality. Stop trying to talk the depressed person out of their sadness. Stop trying to talk the psychotic person out of their delusions. Just offer a hug and ask if they need a ride to their therapist’s office.
People suffering from clinical depression are often likened to an innocent in hell by medical professionals and their loved ones. It always stems from a well-meaning attempt to lift the depressed individual from the quicksand of self-loathing and self-beratement. You are not any of those things you say you are. You are not evil, you are not selfish. I know you. You are an amazing person and you are suffering due to no fault of your own. Basically, an innocent in hell.
I disagree. Yes, it was never my fault that I was depressed, but I am in many ways flawed, and so are you. I am not innocent, and neither are you.
The only difference is that those who are depressed feel the weight of their flaws, and the flaws of others (though mostly their own), far more intensely than those who are not depressed.
While deep in depression, I…
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